Author John Scalzi was on a roll this morning (currently 7:14 AM, 26 Sept. 2014) with a tweet he found from some guy sending out an “ultimatum” to women to “make a choice” between feminism and, well, men like him. So Scalzi launched into a truly magnificent set of scorchers, which I’m posting here for the delectation of people everywhere.
Also: I would like to thank that guy for setting the ultimatum. It makes finding a boyfriend so much easier when the undesirable ones wear a placard identifying themselves.
There is no problem that sass cannot solve
I Reblogged That For You: A Story of Internet Friendship
Right though? RIGHT? Every other show that supposedly has so much subtext~ makes me laugh because have you seen Xena? Literal actual things that have happened on Xena:
- Lots of direct “I love you”s and “You are my heart” and “you’re all that matters to me” “you’re my family” “people think home is a place, it can be a person” “you are my way” “I don’t care what path as long as it’s with you” etc etc
- Gabs pinching Xena’s butt multiple times
- taking baths with each other, giving massages
- Xena, at this point still very stoic in general, pounding on a dead Gabrielle’s chest, screaming “DON’T LEAVE ME” over and over and crying in front of a room full of people
- Joxer asks Xena “Is that a hickey?” and Gabrielle looks so guilty wow
- Duet in musical episode declaring “we’re safe cuz love will be our guide” which makes the evil illusions literally explode
- "Whatever happens, always remember my love for you is endless" - (kiss mark) Xena
- Eve has two moms I mean “Looks like you got your daughter back” “No we got our daughter back”
- that time Gabrielle threw herself and Hope off a cliff to keep Xena from dying
- that time Gabrielle was a pacifist but when Xena was downed, grabbed her sword and went on a rampage killing at least 8 romans to try and protect her
- that time Gabrielle was supposedly dead and Xena followed her into the afterlife, heedless of whether she’d be able to return
- that time Xena was dead and inhabiting Autolycus’ body and she and Gabrielle’s spirits met in some undefined place and she leaned in to kiss her and it cut to Autolycus kissing Gabs with his (Xena’s) hands on her butt
- Xena got fricking Sappho to write Gabrielle a love poem for her birthday. Sappho. Like.
- No really they are 100% canonically soulmates that are reincarnated together time after time, they refer to each other as this multiple times
- also one of those pairs of soulmates got married in modern times(Xena was a dude though, but then they swapped the souls back into the right bodies and now they’re both ladies look this is a weird show okay shhh)
- Gabrielle put into a magical sleep surrounded by fire and only her true love’s kiss can wake her WHO DO YOU THINK DOES THAT HMM
- that time Caesar rewrote history and Xena was his empress and Gabrielle was a playwright that visited rome and they fell in love at first sight and Xena died for her and Gabrielle was so mad she destroyed the world
- "If I only had 30 seconds left to live, this is how I’d want to live them, looking into your eyes"
- I am not even coming close to covering everything
- In conclusion:
that time Caesar rewrote history and Xena was his empress and Gabrielle was a playwright that visited rome and they fell in love at first sight and Xena died for her and Gabrielle was so mad she destroyed the world
I really didn’t watch this show. Wow.
Yeah, I mean, if you didn’t get from how hard they hammered it into your head even though *technically* you could *almost* claim plausible deniability of their Sapphic (CANON) soulmate (CANON) love, well…
You probably had your TV turned off, or were asleep at the time.
Most Sapphic Show Ever, and I did watch The L Word.
I miss this show so much
My little yarn dragon
Trying out the Hitchhiker scarf pattern for the first time.
Reblog from my craft blog
I really need to watch this
The Four Founders of Hogwarts.
This fucked me up for a good 5 minutes.oh
Works for me.
IF YOU DON’T REBLOG THIS
Every. Single. One
I absolutely HATE feeling like this. I get so down, sad, empty, lonely and upset. It makes me feel worthless and my mind’s a mess.
No one needs me. They’re all having fun without me. And if I’d disappear, no one would even bother to notice it.
How my anxiety and depression interact.
Oh hey, literally me
Oh god that is way too accurate…